Transform Your Life: Discover the Art of Taking Exquisite Care of Yourself

Image by Ellen Chan from Pixabay

A friend of mine recently set an intention to take exquisite care of herself, and that word exquisite really grabbed my attention: its meaning pertains to something extremely beautiful and intensely felt. I love it because it sets the bar far higher than a general statement about taking care of oneself.

Since it was mentioned last week I’ve been sitting with the idea, and yesterday I got a true taste of what it really means for me. In short, the more I take care of myself on all levels, the more grateful I feel, and then I feel lighter, happier and am more focused and productive with less effort.

For the first time in a long while I had a massage booked in and, as I was driving to my appointment, I began to appreciate just what a beautiful day it was. The sun was out and the sky was cobalt blue, an aberration in the midst of an otherwise rainy week.

Driving along I noticed how green the hills around me looked and I started to talk to my body (in my head) as if it were another person. I expect a lot of my body and so I was thanking it for all that it holds for me and apologizing I hadn’t been for a massage in some time. As I lay on the massage table, I tuned into my body and the hour that followed was most definitely a practice in appreciation for the very apparent strain and tension that I had put upon my body and was now being unwound.

I know that a lot of that strain and tension doesn’t just come from the physical expectations I put on myself, but also the mental and emotional pressures that accumulate in various places throughout my body. As such, I try to be mindful of the foods I’m eating, the environments I put myself in and the thoughts and feelings I entertain.

My friend was asking me about how to stop the constant churning and spiraling of thoughts that go through our heads at busy or stressful times. I’m most definitely not immune to those, but find it has really helped me to be able to disassociate myself from those thoughts and become a curious observer of them.

This is a skill definitely made easier having practiced meditation regularly for a number of years, but starting with journaling is also a good tool, or anything out in nature where I can connect with Earth’s natural rhythms. All of that helps me become conscious of my thoughts and more curious about them. I’ve got enough experience to know that my thoughts and, therefore, feelings, directly correlate to which part of me is currently in the driving seat, and I have enough wisdom to know I can switch drivers.

Over the weekend I had gotten into a bit of a spiral with my favourite person to hang out with being temporarily in another continent and time zone. I knew it wouldn’t serve me to stay in a funk about it, and in many ways I was relishing some focused me-time. I took a moment to notice the gap I was feeling, I talked about it briefly with some friends, wrote about it in my journal, and really felt into and explored what was going on for me.

In my inner work over the years I’ve dealt with abandonment trauma and how it has showed up in my life in various ways, and spent the time needed in integrating those experiences within my psyche so these situations don’t continue to throw me for a loop. While this was a much healthier situation, there were definitely shades of those old feelings rising up, so I took the time to acknowledge them and get myself into a better space.

However, after my massage, I was far from unhelpful thoughts spiraling, quite the opposite. I was basking in appreciation of such an exquisite massage and thought I’d take advantage of that momentum and headed to the beach for a walk.

Because I was in such a good place mentally, emotionally and physically, I was able to really take in and appreciate the beauty of my surroundings and all the people, birds and dogs that were also sharing that space. While my walks on the beach are also a regular practice in appreciation for me, there are times when my energy isn’t quite so open and expansive; I’m sometimes there simply in need of a big breath of fresh air.

However, yesterday’s walk was exquisite. I was warm, protected against any sun damage, and able to walk freely alongside the ocean and appreciate the sparkling sunlight dancing on the waves, and the sea as it rushed in over my feet a number of times. As I looked out to the horizon I saw the island one of my children’s classes will soon be camping on, and imagined how lovely it will be in such glorious weather.

I left a voice drop for my favourite person telling them what I appreciate about having them in my life, and how much I’m looking forward to reconnecting when they return. But I also appreciate how much life has given each of us in the time apart; it truly has been a blessing in many ways.

Things had aligned yesterday to such an extent that I even had time for swim at my local outdoor pool later on with my friend. It really was a beautiful day that filled me up in so many ways. When I sat down to do some creative, yet technical, work I’d been putting off for a long time, it flowed with more clarity and ease than I could have hoped for.
When I awoke this morning, a daily calendar reminder flashed up to jog my memory to take a moment to tune into what receiving feels like, and to appreciate the decisions I’ve made that support my wellbeing. Immediately yesterday’s experiences came to mind (and were felt in my body)  and with ease I added so many more things to my list.

As I reflect, I can see that there are times I am simply in rescue mode. I take my beach walks or go for a swim because it’s all I can do in that moment to simply show up. What I get out of these things is often a much needed out-breath, but the more present I can be to the practice of appreciating things like my body, my situation, my people, my surroundings and my own wellbeing, the more exquisite care I can take of me and them.

What about you, what do you do to take care of yourself and is it exquisite? How can you adopt an extremely beautiful and intensely felt approach to self care in your life so that you feel lighter, happier, more open yet more focused and productive with less effort?

If you enjoyed reading this, you may enjoy Self Care – When You Should Put Your Needs First, Start With the Self and the Rest Will Take Care of Its-Self, Why Do Some People Seem so Self Absorbed and Not Care About Others?, Make Choices That Will Have the Most Positive Impact in Your Life and Meditation – the Cornerstone to Your Success. To be the first to receive these posts, you can also opt to subscribe to my blog.